Category: Life

Choosing Hope

I haven’t been feeling the greatest the past couple of days. My anxiety level is very high, and my depression makes me feel like I’m locked in a dark room where the only source of light has been snuffed out. But I know that there is hope in all of this. I choose to see hope!

I was blessed to be able to spend time with my husband’s family this past weekend, and that shone a light in the darkness. It was my sister-in-law’s birthday, and it was great to share that special time with her, eating good food and watching football.

Then my Mom and brother came up to see me today! We didn’t do anything too exciting, just went food shopping together…but we did end the visit with a trip to Dunkin’ Donuts. 🙂 I’m very grateful for the opportunity to spend time with them, and hope we can get together again soon.

I have an appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow, so I’m praying that I can communicate to him how low I’ve been feeling…and that he will understand and know what to do. I seems like I’ve tried most every type of treatment available, and this can get discouraging…but I’ve got to keep fighting! Day by day, moment by moment, I need to choose to see hope. And choose to be grateful. ❤

 

Photo by Jasper Boer on Unsplash

Living with Lethargy

Lethargy – noun, plural lethargies
1. The quality or state of being drowsy and dull, listless and unenergetic, or indifferent and lazy; apathetic or sluggish inactivity.
2. Pathology. an abnormal state or disorder characterized by overpowering drowsiness or sleep.
dictionary.com

I struggle a lot with lethargy. It’s been an unwanted companion of my depression for many years. I have to fight to get up in the morning. I have to fight to stay awake throughout the day. And I’m always very happy when bedtime comes around and I can tuck myself into bed for the night.

But it’s not just fighting against sleep. It’s an extreme lack of energy that inhibits me from accomplishing even small tasks. Taking a shower, preparing meals, and paying bills are a few examples of tasks that can be overwhelming to me.

Why is this such a struggle for me? Well, for one, it’s a symptom of my depression. And on top of that, it’s a side effect of several of the medicines that I take to help with my depression. Sometimes I feel like the medicines cause more harm than they do help…but looking back, I have been better on them than off them.

So what do I do to combat this lethargy? I try several different methods. One is that I aim to do everything in baby steps. By breaking down tasks into smaller chunks, it can be more manageable. A second technique is to give thanks for and to allow myself to feel good about the little tasks that I complete. This encourages me to keep pushing forward. Third, I make use of caffeine. I enjoy the taste of coffee and it contains the caffeine that I want, so you will often find me sipping on a cup of joe. And lastly, I have been doing a  Five Minute Energy Routine by Donna Eden on a daily basis. My therapist shared the routine with me, and although I don’t understand all of the science behind it, it does seem to help.

What are your tips for fighting lethargy? Do you have a specific idea or method that really works for you? I’d love to hear about it in the Comments! ❤

 

Photo by Vladislav Muslakov on Unsplash

Recent Happenings

So I haven’t written in a while. Part of the reason for this is that I was having problems with WordPress…and part of the reason is because I wasn’t feeling inspired to write. But WordPress is working now, and whether or not I feel inspired, I’m going to write. 🙂

I was blessed to be able to celebrate my birthday on Tuesday. We got together with both of our families over the prior weekend. Also my hubby took off three whole days from work so that we could spend some time together and relax. We went to Barnes and Noble bookstore, Cracker Barrel, and the Cape May Zoo – and we enjoyed ourselves. The weather was beautiful, the company was amazing, and it was nice to do something a little out of the ordinary.

It was also a blessing to receive so much birthday love. Many people reached out to me to wish me a special day – and that meant a lot. Sometimes I feel alone and unloved…but I need to remind myself that this simply is not true, and that I have friends and family who care deeply about me. So for the birthday love and the all-the-time love, I am grateful.

Another milestone is that I finished my Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) about a month ago. It helped some with the depression, but it also helped my anxiety and OCD through the mindfulness training that I received. Now that my treatments are over, I need to keep up with practicing and with applying what I’ve learned.

So although my mood has been up and down over the past several weeks and I haven’t felt like writing, God has been with me, and has helped me to take one baby step after another. He is good all of the time – and for this I am thankful. ❤

 

Photo Credit: Crystal Knauss (picture was taken at the Cape May Zoo)