When Joy Seems Elusive

I’ve been falling back into the mud and mire of depression.

There are numerous reasons for this. The struggle with insomnia has left me extremely tired. The hormone medicine I was taking to assist in achieving pregnancy affected me poorly, leaving me feeling anxious, irritable, and overwhelmed. And I’ve been experiencing loneliness for some time now.

I try to pull myself up out of the pit, but it’s not working. What I really need is for God to pull me up out of this muck.

With the holiday season upon us, I’ve wanted to focus on being grateful. On praising my Father for Who He is and all that He’s provided. On reaching out to others who need love. I haven’t succeeded yet in doing this. I need to be intentional – to do whatever it takes to be a blessing…even if I feel like I’m sinking into the depths. I know that if I can focus on other people, I will begin to feel better. Please pray that I can do this.

Through all of this, God has been faithful. I know He’s with me, and that I can go to Him at any time, and for any reason. He is my loving Father. My Comforter. My Savior. My Friend. I can trust in Him fully, and I can rely on His Word and His Spirit for guidance.

I’ve been reading through the Psalms, as these poignant songs really resonate with me in my situation. They help me to be honest with God, and to express what’s going on inside my heart. Yesterday as I was reading I came across a passage that encouraged me and gave me hope. I believe that as I cling to the truths in these verses, God will lift my spirit and restore my joy and gratitude. ❤

“But I have trusted in Your steadfast love;
my heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.
I will sing to the LORD,
because He has dealt bountifully with me.”

~ Psalm 13:5-6 ESV


Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

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