God Sees Me

“But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.'” ~ 1 Samuel 16:7

I came across the above verse as I was reading an eBook tonight, and it hit me:

GOD SEES ME.

He truly sees me, for who I am and for what’s in my heart, and not for the superficial things that many people look at.

He sees the hurt that I hold inside. He sees the anxiety that rears up when I think about certain things. He sees when I feel so low that it takes great effort to complete small tasks. He sees all of this – and more.

But in light of this fact, what does He see in my heart? How clean are my thoughts? How does He feel about the motives that I possess?

Since these are the things that God is looking at, I can only imagine that it must be important for me to keep my character pleasing to Him.

I pray that I can make God smile with who I am on the inside.

Thank You, Father, for seeing through the facade that I often-times project. Thank you for not being swayed by the things that are important to man, such as what type of job I have, how much money I make, how big my house is, or how many friends I have. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. And YOU SEE ME completely…from the inside out.

Out of the Pit

The last several months have been overwhelming.

I’ve been struggling a lot with depression, and I got to the point where I knew the medicines and therapy were not doing enough to help, and that I needed to try something different.

So I decided to embark on a new journey: ECT (Electroconvulsive Therapy). It’s been scary, and encouraging, and frustrating, and confusing, and promising…all at the same time.

I’ve been undergoing the ECT procedure twice a week for around twelve weeks now. Unfortunately, it has affected my memory. But it does seem to have given me that extra “boost” I needed to climb out of the dark pit of depression; and for this I am grateful.

If you are struggling with depression, you are not alone. Take comfort in the fact that there are others who are walking this road with you – most importantly, Jesus Christ. He understands what we are going through, and He is right there with us to give us the strength and encouragement to take the next small step along the path that He has for us.

Photo by: James McGill