Tag: infertility

Tired but Hopeful

The past week or so has been more than a little tiring.

Things started off well. I was blessed with some donated medicine from my fertility center, which had been prescribed for me in the past but we weren’t able to afford. It’s called Gonal-f and it’s used to help a woman develop a mature egg during her cycle. I was very grateful for this, but I wasn’t really prepared for how the medicine would affect me.

I learned to give myself the first injection of the Gonal-f Friday night, as my husband had to work and couldn’t help. I watched the instructional video numerous times and was finally able to administer the shot to myself successfully. I was proud of this. 🙂 Over the weekend and into the beginning of this week I have been able to give myself the injection around the same time each evening, as instructed. I’ve been excited to see if it will help.

After a day or two of the shots I started to feel really emotional and more depressed than I normally do. It seems that these can be side effects of the medicine…so I’ve been trying my best to stay upbeat and to express my emotions in healthy ways.

I think the medicine is also making me super tired. I haven’t felt like doing much of anything recently, and small tasks leave me feeling drained. It seems that the sleepiness can be a side effect of the medicine too – but all of the side effects will be well worth it if it helps me to conceive this cycle.

This fertility process has been quite the journey so far! My husband Roy and I have learned a lot of new terminology and information. We’ve made many visits to the fertility center (most of the time I go by myself, as Roy has to work, but he comes when he can and when he needs to). We’ve learned how to administer injections. I’ve received countless ultrasounds and blood testings. And we’ve had many highs and lows.

But we’re seeking God’s guidance and embarking on this journey together. Even though the process is stressful, it’s helping us to grow closer to each other. And we’re trying our best to remain hopeful for the future.

The rest we must leave in the Lord’s hands, trusting that He is good and that He knows what is best for us. ❤

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

Hope for Tomorrow

“My body is broken.”

I couldn’t help but think this as I left the fertility center for the second time today.

I had gotten blood-work done in the morning, and within a few hours had received the news that I was not pregnant. Then I was required to return to the center in the afternoon for an endometrial scratch, which can help with implantation during my next cycle.

As I drove away from the office, my eyes welled up with tears.

I haven’t really cried very much throughout this process…but today it came through. It seems that no matter what medicines or shots I take to try to help, it just doesn’t work.

My husband is discouraged, too. He brought up the possibility of adoption again…but I told him that if these next few IUI (IntraUterine Insemination) cycles don’t work, we can hopefully try IVF (In Vitro Fertilization).

It’s our last option for trying to conceive.

Well, I shouldn’t say “our last option.” God has the situation under control, and He could enable us to conceive at any time. We want what He wants, and will continue to pray accordingly.

But the waiting IS hard. The uncertainty. The negative pregnancy tests. These things are difficult to experience, but they are not enough to break our hope.

The Lord will always accomplish His perfect plan in our lives. For this reason, we keep going. Keep praying. Keep trusting. God will waste no part of our journey – and this brings us hope for tomorrow. ❤

Photo by Ray Hennessy on Unsplash

Decisions, Decisions

So I had a little bit of a different outcome at the fertility doctor’s office today.

I came in for an US (ultrasound), bloodwork, and a post coital test. I could only do the post coital test if my follicle (developing egg) was large enough – and it was, thankfully. They performed the test and after looking at my sample through a microscope, they informed me that my results were favorable. What does this mean? The Hubby and I can do things naturally this month, if we would like to.

For the previous four months, Roy and I have had an IUI (Intrauterine Insemination) procedure performed at the appropriate time in my cycle. My cervical mucus had not been a favorable environment, so they needed to bypass all of that by performing the IUI’s. My doctor had advised me to take Mucinex to help with my mucus, but this hadn’t been successful. After taking the Mucinex and then completing the post coital test this cycle, however, they determined that my mucus was a good environment.

Which means we’re faced with a different question than normal: should we go ahead and do things naturally this cycle, or should we have the IUI performed anyway? The pro to having the IUI performed anyway would be that if I failed to conceive this cycle, we would know that it wasn’t because of my cervical mucus, as the IUI would bypass that. The con to performing the IUI is the procedure itself. It’s a little bit involved…and it’s not easy to go through. Doing things naturally would be much easier. But we want to do what will produce the most favorable results.

The doctor’s office will be calling me later today to give me the results of my bloodwork and to provide further instructions. At that point I guess we’ll have to talk it over and make a decision. We are praying, and I know that other people are praying for us, so I trust that God will guide us in the way He knows is best.

Undergoing fertility treatments has definitely been a journey in and of itself for us. But the Lord has been faithful so far…and I believe that He will finish what He has begun, in His time and His way.

Thank you so much for your support as we undertake this journey! And I wanted to apologize for all of the terminology in this post – it’s difficult to provide more detail than a cursory explanation without utilizing the terms. But please let me know if I was too confusing or if anything seemed overly candid. Thanks again. ❤

 

Photo by Jake Melara on Unsplash